Befriending Fear (2 min read)

Last week, my preschooler and I ventured into the woods to meet some classmates for a forest day at her preschool. We got a bit lost on the way, since a recent storm obscured the trails.

After some meandering, we heard the echoes of tiny voices, and we knew we were close. The way down to the clearing where the kids were was steep, but we started to make our way down. Then--luckily--a teacher spotted us and let us know about a steep drop-off at the bottom of the trail we were on. She helped us get back up the hill and get on a safer trail.

Latter that day, a fearful voice piped up over and over: "What if we had reached the drop-off?!" It was the unmistakable sting of anxiety, wringing my guts with parental fear over the safety of my child.

The fear kept resurfacing over the next day, until I watched this interview with author and New York Times columnist Carl Richards. In this personal interview, he off-handedly mentioned that although fear can be misplaced, its ultimate purpose is to protect us. Therefore, we should not strive to banish it all together.

In that moment, I had a sudden sense of gratitude for my fear--for its efforts in protecting me and my child. By acknowledging the fear and being thankful for its protective role in the moment, I could shift my perspective and begin to see it as a helpful.

I have heard fear being described as an acronym for "False Evidence Appearing Real," but that framework did not feel like a good fit in this situation. Rather than battling fear, it felt like much less work to appreciate its rightful job as an overzealous protector.

Has fear ever been helpful to you?

Warm regards,

-Mariya